Benjarong Gets Thai Food Wrong


Okay, so you all know I don’t really bitch, whine, or complain much. (‘Scuse me a minute while I cover my ears to shut out the vehement dissent of The Spouse and my children, the derisive laughter of my friends, and the collective gasp of disbelief from everyone else who knows me). Right now though, if I had a pen instead of a keyboard, I’d be dipping it in acid. This restaurant should change its name to Benja-wrong.

Oriental decor...

Vaguely Oriental decor...

Last week, Giant Vacuum Cleaner and I had two hours to kill between buying him a “light grey zip-up hoodie with fleece lining” and dropping him off for a movie (yes, he has a busier social schedule than I do). I thought Benjarong would be an good choice for a quick meal in a nice ambience. Given the chilly weather, we were both craving the spice and flavors of Thai cuisine.

The elevator takes you straight up to the third floor, and you enter a tastefully – albeit unimaginatively – decorated space, in a predictable maroon and off-white color palette cued with Buddha heads and other vaguely Oriental artifacts. We were greeted by a girl dressed in a sarong (yawn!) and seated quickly and efficiently. 

Miang Kham

Miang Kham

As we perused our menu, a plate of complimentary Miang Kham arrived at the table. In Thailand and Vietnam, miang kham is served with betel leaves; although it is perfectly acceptable to serve it in lettuce leaves, as Benjarong does, I see no reason to do so by default. Why not offer the diner a choice? And the tamarind sauce is nice and tangy, but where, oh where is the dried shrimp? At that point, I was willing to concede that this was some kind of vegetarian version, and enjoyed rolling up the leaves and waiting for the explosion of contrasting flavors and textures to hit my taste buds.

We decided to keep things simple. A Neua Tod Prik Tai On (a fried beef tenderloin starter), Hor Mok Goong (I can never resist hor mok), Som Tam, Steamed Rice, and a Kaeng Phed. After some debate over which kaeng phet to order, we opted for duck. We also ordered two drinks – a Ginger Lemon Cooler for me, and a house special known as a Siam Sparkle for Vacuum Cleaner.

It took longer than expected for our drinks to arrive, but when they did, the ginger lemon was refreshing and the Siam Sparkle was a pleasant surprise. It resembled champagne, golden and sparkling, and had an interesting aftertaste – cassia bark, I think. I asked what the fizz came from, and was told they use 7Up. It’s been a while since I’ve tasted an interesting non-alcoholic drink. And that’s the last nice thing I have to say about my experience with this restaurant.

The Food, Such As It Is…

Chewy

Chewy and over-battered beef: a non-starter

The starter, Neua Tod Prik Tai On, arrived. Allow me to deconstruct: “neua” means beef. “Tod” means deep fried. “Prik t(h)ai on” refers to raw green peppercorns.

So. I wasn’t sure whether the meat we received was beef (neua) – couldn’t tell, because it was half-burnt and chewy. A fact that is only evident after you manage to crunch through too much cornflour batter. It was certainly deep fried (tod), because it was swimming in oil, as you can see from the picture if you click on it for a closer look (rim of plate). And as for the green peppercorns (prik thai on), I mistakenly thought there were none, but found one little cluster of them when I was cropping this picture for upload. See if you can spot it. Hint: it’s hidden somewhere near the top of the frame.

The rest of our food arrived, and took its time doing so. Let’s take it from the top.

Malayali-masquerading-as-Thai curry

Kerala-masquerading-as-Thai cuisine

Hor Mok. Whatever Benjarong is serving, or thinks it is serving, it’s not hor mok. Hor mok is supposed to be a delicately steamed curry with the consistency of custard and the texture of a soufflé. We received a thick, Kerala-style coconut curry containing lots of finely diced prawn, served in a banana leaf cup. Perhaps it had been steamed, perhaps not. Was it tasty? I suppose. Was it hor mok? Hell, no.

"Good from far but far from good"

"Good from far but far from good :D"

Peht Kaeng Phed. All we wanted was a simple Thai red curry. You know, the kind you can make at home from a curry paste packet, with the addition of fresh coconut milk, some meat, and if you’re finicky like me, some fried basil leaves and fresh lemon grass for added aroma. Instead, we got a coconut-based curry with a few boiled basil leaves floating limp and helpless atop it. The coconut milk had split during cooking, and by the color of the meat and its inordinately high fat content, we were being served duck leg rather than breast.

Tasteless. Insipid. Blah. These are mild words. I’m trying to be polite;  otherwise, I’d probably used words like: awful. Deplorable. Atrocious.

Som tam... should be renamed "ho hum"

Som tam... should be renamed "ho hum"

Som Tam. By now, we were hungry enough to eat just the som tam with the steamed rice. Som tam is the simplest and most ubiquitous of all Thai salads. Finely shredded raw papaya is supposed to be pounded lightly in a pestle with garlic and chillies and then dressed in a combination of fish sauce, palm sugar, and lime juice. Chopped tomato and crushed peanuts are sprinkled on top, and a green bean or two thrown in for color and textural variety.

At Benjarong, however, the papaya has been grated into thickish strips (or more likely, cut into strips with a peeler), there’s not even a hint of fish sauce, and the chilli component is woefully lacking. And there are bits of carrot in it too. Ugh.

Service, Or Lack Thereof

Since Vacuum Cleaner absolutely had to meet his friends on time or risk social suicide, I had no time to complain or send the food back to the kitchen. Leaving most of  it untouched, I quietly asked for my check.

Yes, but despite that... would you like some dessert?

Yes, but despite that... would you like some dessert?

Meanwhile, a nearby table of four was in the process of sending back their burnt beef, trying to figure out why the beer they ordered 15 minutes ago still hadn’t arrived, and asking to speak to a manager. Who asked their forgiveness for these lapses because they were “busy downstairs” at Zara, the tapas bar. At the only other occupied table, another diner gesticulated unhappily, saying something uncomplimentary about his soup.

Over 15 minutes later, the “should-have-sat-downstairs” table was presented with a fresh plate of beef. They sent it back to the kitchen “with compliments to the chef” because they’d already finished their meal. My check still hadn’t arrived – but a sweetly smiling waitperson had. “How was the food?” he asked. “It was horrible,” I stated in my matter-of-fact way, “and I’d like my check. Now.” His response: “Can I get you some dessert ma’am?”

Up until then, I’d stayed calm. A maitre d’ then appeared. When I said that I didn’t have the time to provide feedback, was now in a tearing hurry, and would like my check – but would be happy to provide specific inputs and feedback if they emailed me – he asked for my contact details. I produced a business card. He then wasted another 10 minutes of my time trying to persuade me that the meal was on the house (Now if he’d done that before I gave him my card, I just might have accepted).

Damage Control…

After I paid the bill and left, Aji Joseph, the manager/chef from Zara, followed me outside to ask what the problem had been. I explained (again) that I hadn’t the time to provide any inputs as I was already late, told him that amongst other things, the curry contained split coconut milk, and asked him to email me for more detailed feedback.

Three days later, I received email from Regi Mathew, the owner/chef of Benjarong, apologizing for my bad experience, thanking me for my “advice” and inviting me to visit again “in order to see how we have incorporated your feedback.” Huh? Whuh? Wha?

I did subsequently have a long conversation with Mr. Mathew, in which I elucidated every sorry detail of the experience. He seemed receptive, and disappointed that his staff had let him down. He promised to look into and rectify all the issues.

Would that be enough to get me to spend my time or money at Benjarong again? In a word, no. Here’s why:

  1. Hanging Buddha heads on the wall, dressing women in sarongs, and playing Oriental-sounding music will never persuade diners that the food on the table is Thai. Assuming that you can fool their palates in this way insults their intelligence.
  2. Beautifully carved vegetables won’t do the job either. I promise.
  3. Any restaurant purporting to serve Thai food that can screw up something as simple as a som tam and a kaeng phet on the same day doesn’t deserve my business. Less so one that charges Rs. 600 for the privilege.
  4. Rs. 1781 for a meal like that, even if it had been properly prepared, is OVERPRICED. My friends will tell you that I don’t say that about too many things. In this case, you cannot argue that you’re paying for the ambience, which is very ordinary. And you’re sure as hell not paying for the service. (The bill, as you can see, includes a 5% service charge). Go figure!

    Overpriced. Even for me.

    Rs. 1781 for two: Overpriced. Even for me.

I have since spoken to several informed diners who have eaten at Benjarong. They described the food as “decent” (as opposed to “amazing”, “fantastic”, “fabulous”, or even just plain “good”). I’m sorry, but in my book, “decent” just doesn’t cut it, not with that price tag attached.

As a comparison, see my bill at Shiok, for three of us (the service and the food are MUCH better; the fish in chilli and lime sauce was to die for), and my bill from delivery kitchen Asia in a Box for last night’s at-home dinner for five. So much more food for so much less moolah. Your call.

Rs.  for more food, better food

Rs. 1795 for three: more food, better food

Rs. 972, enough to feed five, plus leftovers for two

Rs. 972: enough to feed five, plus leftovers for two

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to Ma.gnoliaAdd to TechnoratiAdd to FurlAdd to Newsvine

Advertisements

15 thoughts on “Benjarong Gets Thai Food Wrong

  1. thanks for the review! I’d been wanting to go try it, but I definitely won’t now! I felt the same way about Toscano though, but you’ve given it a good review. Maybe it was just a bad day?

    • Sanjana: I have eaten at Toscano several times. My only grouse has been the steady decline in quality of service, not food. Also, I have only ever lunched there, and I understand they have a separate dinner menu. I’d say give it another shot. Food is a subjective thing… even with Benjarong, for example, if you have never tried Thai before, you would likely describe the food as tasty.

  2. I love Thailand, I love Thai food and most of all I love eating Thai food in Thailand and I have to say after the demise of Blores best Thai with a modern spin, aka – Tai Tai (the same people responsible for Asia in a box) Benjarong is the next best thing. In December 2008 I dined at Benjarong about 4 times. 3 out of 4 meals were very good. I must note that your observation abt the fish sauce on their salads, dried shrimp from their beetle leaf amuse gul is spot on as well as the lack of overall lightness that is charachteristically Thai.

    I must say I can’t get their waterchestnuts in coconut milk out of my mind – they were divine – simply to die for. Either the standard has slipped since December, or you had a bad day!

    • Hi Megan – thanks for dropping by. I dropped by your blog before publishing this post, looking for people who had good things to say about Benjarong. To be honest, yours was the only one I found, other than those on Burrp, which I find either uninformed or clearly planted by owners or competition. If you’ll read my FAQ, you’ll see that I review only after dining at an establishment several times. So yeah, I’m guessing that standards have slipped… perhaps that’s because Mr. Mathew has moved to Chennai. Whatever be the reason, it ain’t the diner’s problem – if you’re charging the same price as you were in Dec ’08, you need to serve the same quality of food!

  3. Hi Suman,

    I am happy I chanced upon your blog. Though I am strictly vegetarian, I have enjoyed your review of food and restaurants.

    Friends of mine have been to Benjarong in Chennai and found the food good. That was at least a year back and I have been wanting to visit the one here. But I guess, I will do that when I am in Chennai 🙂

  4. Sowmya: Hiya, and thanks for dropping by. I am making a conscientious effort to write more veggie-oriented content… however, since I don’t have the depth of knowledge required, I’m still learning! Keep coming though – I may surprise you!

  5. Ha ha! I once attended a Thai cooking class held at The Oberoi in Delhi, for a feature I was working on. It was full of wives of Delhi industrialists, most of whom considered Thailand their backyard but wanted to learn dishes without fish sauce. Guess this tries to please that palate ;-p

  6. Great review, Suman. I haven’t been to the Benjarong in Bangalore, but seeing how the one in Chennai is still treated like a holy cow in spite of falling standards, it is good to see someone with a forthright review.

    In fact Zara from the same group is even worse. It abuses both the concept of tapas and spanish cuisine. As does, Hot Breads. In their whole group, one which really stands out is Ente Keralam in Chennai.

  7. Hey,

    I just chanced upon your review. I’ve been planning to go to Benjarong for quite sometime but your review definitely influenced me never to go there!!
    I want to go to a restaurant which serves really good thai or italian food in indiranagar. Do you have any suggestions?

  8. Hi Suman, A friend and I lunched at “Benja Wrong” this afternoon. I believe more than getting their food wrong they somehow dont get the A of hospitality. I arrived early and had wait for 20 mins for my friend to get there and only then be offered water. We order drinks which did not come to us but remarkably sneaked into the bill and best of all they forgot to serve us one dish which sat on the dummy waiter for about 15 minutes cooling before we pointed it out. All in all we were parched, served cold food and billed for something we did not get.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s